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Joke of the Day

"The only good thing about being a chemist... Is that no one knows what I'm doing with my dog when I tell them ""I'll be in my lab""."

"I'm certain there are female hormones in beer. When I drink too much, I talk nonsense and I cannot control my car."

"What's the shortest organ in a goat? An ISIS member's dick."

"Prison Guard: ""So you two cons are in love?"" Con1: ""Yes."" Con2: ""It's like we finish each other's..."" *in unison* ""death sentences."""

"The Detroit Lions have been given guns to subvert increasing violence in the area... ...local zookeepers fear the worst."

"What's the difference between your wife and your job? After five years your job will still suck"

"What do you call it when you hold a Jewish girl under the covers and fart? A dutch oven..."

"White lies are fine. Don't tell a black lie though. Black lies matter."

"How do Jewish turtles greet each other? Shellom."

"What did the poor composer say to his friend? I am baroque, can you lend me some money?"