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Joke of the Day
"Red sky at night shepherd's delight. Red sky in the morning... Your barn's on fire."
Next Joke
"Why are people still calling my phone I thought we covered this at orientation..."
"*mugger snatching Elsa's purse Elsa: LET IT GO! Mugger: LET IT GO! Elsa: CANT HOLD IT BACK ANYMORE! Mugger: LET IT GO! Elsa: LET IT GO!"
"don't usually brag about helping people, but when I saw an old lady drop her groceries, I yelled: ""lift with a straight back!"" it felt good"
"Why is King Kong big and hairy? So you can tell him apart from a gooseberry."
"Robert Khardasian was OJ Simpson's lawyer And thus began the family tradition of getting black men off."
"As a man in his 70s I still manage to have sex with my wife almost every day... Almost Monday, almost Tuesday...."
"First Guy: ""How many vampires showed up to the garlic eating competition today?"" ... ... ..... Second Guy: ""I don't know, it was countless."""
"Just got out of a 13 month coma Just in time to see my child born!"
"How did Pinocchio figure out he was made of wood? He was jacking off one day and his hand caught on fire."