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Joke of the Day

"don't usually brag about helping people, but when I saw an old lady drop her groceries, I yelled: ""lift with a straight back!"" it felt good"

"Why does Bill Clinton wear boxers in the winter time? To keep Hillary's chin warm!"

"All women want to be swept off their feet, until you push them into the sea. Dating is hard!"

"Why can you see through Bruce Jenner? Because he is a trans-parent."

"My dad just told me I should ""stop wasting my life and do something meaningful"" Dad jokes, am I right?"

"What do you call a poor photographer who works for a tabloid? A Pauperazzi"

"A fun thing to do when someone shows you a picture of their new baby is to look confused and just say ""I don't get it?"""

"Wife just texted me drive slow - cop around the corner so I laughed and showed it to the cop."

"Jared Fogle ""the subway guy"" was upset to be sentenced to 15 and 1/2 years in Prison today... Funny because 15 1/2 years used to sound pretty good to him."

"Why don't chickens wear underwear? Because its pecker is on its face."