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Joke of the Day

"First Guy: ""How many vampires showed up to the garlic eating competition today?"" ... ... ..... Second Guy: ""I don't know, it was countless."""

"Jethro's logical logic Classic from Jethro, [Logical Logic](http://youtu.be/lMBVMyXaCng)"

"What is the oldest joke we have on record? (X-post) http://www.reddit.com/r/AskHistorians/comments/2krnv8/what_is_the_oldest_joke_we_have_on_record/"

"Why are people so worried about Hurricane Matthew's wind speeds? I thought CAT4 was capped at 16Mbps."

"How do you capture a polar bear? 1. Dig a hole in the ice. 2. Place a bunch of peas around the hole 3. When the bear comes up to take a pea, you kick him in the ice hole."

"Why is the Ferguson Police Department a fan of Pokemon? Because you gotta catch Jamal"

"Surprisingly, Mike Rowe from the show Dirty Jobs has trouble with women. They all say he has a Mike Rowe penis."

"I always drink a cocktail before having sex My dad always told me ""You need a good screwdriver to really screw something""."

"What is Shaka's favorite Japanese food? Shakitori!"

"Unless: -The house is on fire -The cops are about to kick down the door -Or you're ordering food Do NOT talk to me while I'm on the toilet"