28875

Joke of the Day

"I politely asked a woman on my flight if she could put her kid in the overhead compartment & she looked at me like I was crazy or something."

Next Joke
 
"I wrote 'DIVORCE', my wife wrote 'YES'. Tough way to find out, but at least I won our last game of Scrabble"
"Did you hear about the man with five dicks? His pants fit like a glove. I'm so sorry. So sorry."
"What do you call a magic door? Dumbledoor!"
"[trying to stick a dollar in a vending machine] vending machine: i have a boyfriend"
"I like my coffee like I like my women From a third world country and covered in cream"
"I'm in such a weird place in my life right now. Literally. This shop only sells Owls and Mayonnaise."
"What's brown and runs around your garden? Your fence."
"Long story short, I accidentally left the cat in the refrigerator."
"Last month I lost my camouflage hat... I'm not sure how I should feel about this"