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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a magic door? Dumbledoor!"

"Two Snare drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff buh dum tss"

"Q: How can you identify an Irish pirate? A: He's the one with patches over both eyes."

"My Aunt Used to Drink 13's It's the Polish version of the seven & seven. Source: my dad... Not sure if he made it up or what but made me laugh."

"I wonder if Houdini ever locked himself out of the house."

"911? Yes, I was making donuts and... yes, donuts... yes, I'll hold. DAMN YOU GUYS ARE FAST!"

"Find myself in the need for some really despicable jokes. Come on Reddit, do your worst. What kind of file do you need to turn a 15mm hole into a 40mm hole? A Pedophile."

"Has anyone even thought to look in San Diego for Carmen Sandiego? Think about it, it's a little *too* obvious. Which means it's perfect."

"A joke about procrastination. Eh, I'll write it later."

"A simpler, more believable theory is that all the dinosaurs got married and just quit having sex all together."