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Joke of the Day

"If I was in a room with Trump and HRC....... and I had a gun and one bullet.... I'd shoot myself in the head...."

"If you want to hide a gift for your husband, just put it in the pantry with one thing in front of it."

"You know why ancient Greek children were always getting lost from their parents? 'Cause they kept Roman around!"

"I made my summoner name 'jokeaboutaredditmoderator' on League of Legends The enemy team kept deleting me"

"I was looking at my bank statement and realized I was a .1 percent-er I don't know why anyone wants to be one, it's a crappy interest rate."

"What would the most depressing game show be? Biggest Loser: All-Stars."

"What did hitler say on his cake day? YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN USING THE OVENS FOR THE FINAL SOLUTION!"

"If you still had hope for kids today, a teenager in a bookstore pointed to a book title and asked me if it was about World War Two or Eleven"

"What do you call it when a bunch of deer have an intervention for one of their friends? Change for a buck."

"Whenever I watch a home invasion thriller, I'm mostly terrified by how I'll never be able to afford to own a home."