197715

Joke of the Day

"Why didn't Darth Vader make it as a stand up comic? Fans thought his sense of humor was a little too on the dark side."

"It's kill or be killed. Or eat a sandwich. Maybe go for a light jog. Draw a picture of a duck. There are a lot of options out there."

"Dunno how you Americans have the motivation and energy to pronounce the 'y' in 'basil' and 'tomatoes'."

"I hate people who don't finish"

"Why is polar bear cheap to have as a pet ? It lives on ice !"

"What does a bowling ball and your mom have in common? You can pick them up, stick your fingers in them, and throw them in the gutter, and they'll always come back."

"What is loud and sounds like ""apple""? (scream) APPLE!!!"

"The other day, a frog jumped underneath my lawmower.. I guess he was trying to *kermit* suicide."

"Why did the sweet scented man called Paul change his name to Saul? He liked the P, but preferred the essence the change."

"I ejaculated so hard That conspiracy theorists are saying there was a second shooter."