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Joke of the Day

"Health food? Baby, my body is a '93 Honda hatchback with a headlight out. I'm not about to start putting premium gas in it now."

"Life is like a penis Freely Hanging and Relaxing, it's woman who make it harder"

"Teachers call me a fish because I'm below C level"

"""No points, illegal kick to the face."" ""But I'm the hero of this movie."" ""Fair enough, here's your trophy."" -The Karate Kid"

"News: Boy George's reptile bites 5 people in one day.' He needs a calmer chameleon."

"Why are most cemeteries fenced in? Because everyone is dying to get in"

"Stages of beard length: 1.) sexy stubble 2.) sea captain beard 2.) prisoner of war beard 3.) homeless person beard 4.) wizard beard"

"What kind of Bees make milk? Boo-bees (say it out loud =D) NOTE: Not original. My uncle heard it on the radio, told it to me, and I shared it with you guys."

"Did you hear about the butcher who backed into the meat grinder? He got a little behind in his work"

"I went to see the worst faith healer ever last night. He was so bad, a bloke in a wheelchair got up and walked out."