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Joke of the Day

"What's red and blue and sogs up your Easter basket? Coloured scrambled eggs"

"Why do the 3rd Italian Navy use glass-bottomed battleships? So they can look at the 2nd Italian Navy! *[Sorry if you are offended]* Edit: Grammar"

"TIFU getting fired from the calendar factory All I did was take a day off."

"I'm going to walk up to strangers and ask ""Would you take a photo of me?"" If they say yes, I will hand them a photo of me and walk away."

"Three friends were casually talking. -I bumped into my Russian friend yesterday -Vladislav? -Baby don't hurt me, don't hurt me, no more!"

"Did you know there's actually 4 scientific bonds? * Ionic Bond * Metallic Bond * Covalent Bond * James Bond"

"*sees neighbor put his garbage in our trash can* ME: *goes to find hub* ""You know what makes me mad?"" HUB: *points to self*"

"Why am I still hearing noises from the class? Because you still have ears, teacher."

"I love Easter. My unborn children get to play find the egg tonight."

"Do you guys know the difference between ""girlfriend"" and ""girl friend?"" ... that little empty void in the middle.. Known as the ""friend zone"" .."