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Joke of the Day

"wife: ""just break it to him gently"" me: ""ok ill try"" [tucking son in bed] me: [opening story book] ""once upon a time your grandma's dead"""

"Have you heard the joke about the broken pencil? Nevermind, its pointless."

"What's the Cuban national anthem? Row, row, row your boat"

"Why did the frog jump under the lawn mower? He wanted to Kermit suicide."

"I don't always drink.... What were we talking about again?"

"What do you call a spider from Baghdad? An Iraqnid."

"My dad's bread factory burnt down Now his business is toast"

"How do you have a party in space? You planet."

"What food can tell you if a girl is pregnant? Chickpea"

"I had to memorize a random 18 digit password before she'd let me in. Guess who stole your Soap Opera Digest out of the mailbox, Mom?"