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Joke of the Day

"An Englishman, and Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar... ... and the barman says ""What do you think this is, some kind of joke?"

"Everyone in my family is quite wealthy and successful... ...but I hate following the crowd, so I decided to become a panhandler instead. I beg to differ."

"i wonder wat time is *looks at wrist only to realize i am not wearig a watch* ah yes, i had forgoten that time is but a invisible everything"

"Kim Kardashian as First Lady"

"Baby seal So, a baby seal walks into a club... ... ..."

"I can't believe people say people who don't believe in climate change don't care about the environment. Just look how well they recycle their arguments!"

"When does it Rain Money? When there's a change in the weather."

"So I've Been Making this Joke About Alkaline Metals Recently... I'ts been getting a lot of good reactions!"

"When Facebook goes down, everyone comes to Twitter to talk about it. When Twitter goes down, the world falls mute."

"If you need a ride to the airport, give me at least two weeks notice so I'll have a chance to clear my schedule and die"