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Joke of the Day

"I've been hitting ""remind me later"" for about the last 4 years on Adobe."

"If you've never baked pot brownies in an Easy Bake Oven... then you've never wrote an apology letter to your sister with an Etch A Sketch."

"I hate when my wife says her friend at work ""got flowers again today"" and I have to kill that chick's husband."

"A tornado hit a local dairy farm. Da-Brie was scattered everywhere!"

"I like my women like I like my smartphones Slender and Korean"

"My mf kid poured a bag of Cheerios crumbs in my bed like she saw the horse head in godfather and thought I can beat that"

"What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? Pull the pin and throw it back. "

"A butcher married a baker and had a kid who grew up to be what? Fat."

"Who is the coolest guy in the Hospital? A. The Ultra Sound guy. Q. Who is the second coolest? A. The Hip replacement dude."

"A feminist, a vegan, and a person who does CrossFit walk into a bar. I know this because they didn't shut up about it the entire night."