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Joke of the Day
"How do you make five pounds of fat look good? Put a nipple on it.."
Next Joke
"Why don't women have men's brains?Because they don't have penises to put them in."
"A mongoose is just a goose who listens to reggae"
"Bill: My sister has lovely long red hair all down her back. Will: Pity it's not on her head."
"What did the suicide bombing instructor say to his students? ""Pay attention. I'm only going to show this to you once."""
"My stomach just made a really weird noise. So I'm just going to send a pizza down to check it out."
"Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven acht nein."
"Did you hear about how much those new prosthetic limbs cost? An arm and a leg."
"[hostage situation] Any last words? ""Nah, I'm good."" If you insist. *puts gun to head* Say you're prayers. ""You are prayers. Lol."""
"Apparently my facebook friend, Ashley, has a cat suffering from a horrible hairball. I'll be spending the day praying for it like she asked."