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Joke of the Day

"The kids at school used to call my mum the village bike She wasn't promiscuous; when I was six years old she went missing and they found her in the canal. (Mat Ewins)"

"I think Stu does not gets the recognition he deserves Without him, those who are studying would just be dying."

"Anti-virus pioneer John McAfee is wanted by the Police for murder charges. If they catch him I guess the trial will last 30 days."

"*Makes joke on Twitter* *5 Retweets* *Makes same joke on Facebook* *5 comments from aunts saying that the joke was inappropriate*"

"Why did the blind man walk into a wall? Somebody shot his dog"

"What did the lesbian vampire say to the other? See ya next month."

"What do you call money you pay prostitutes? Headquarters"

"I failed my Health and Safety class test today. Apparently, when they ask you,""In the event of a fire, what steps would you take?"" ""F**kin' large ones"" is not the correct answer."

"My friend said she's had kidney problems since she was 7 I told her it's fine cause once she turns 18 she'll get adult knees"

"When I like a girl, I play it cool. I wait. I text once, wait 60 years, and then I die."