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Joke of the Day

"The best way to return any clothing left at your place is to do a drive-by with a t-shirt gun on her wedding day."

"My girlfriend got her period last night while she was sleeping... In other news, I have a Japanese flag for sale now"

"Dentist: this is gonna hurt a lot Me: ok Dentist: I've been sleeping with your wife"

"The lesbian vampire Did you hear about the bar-hopping, lesbian vampire? Once a month, she goes to gay bars and drinks everyone under the table."

"What's the fastest way to ruin free pie? Put the word 'gluten' at the beginning"

"Sheryl Sandberg's husband died while exercising on a treadmill. He was trying to get his Lean In."

"What do you call a baseball player who watches porn? A master batter"

"What did the black kid get for christmas? Your bike."

"Fellas, here's a flirting tip: If a girl plays with her hair while taking to you, it means she has lice and you should stay away from her."

"What do you call a cheese that's not yours? My cheese!"