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Joke of the Day
"Why aren't there any black magicians? Because magic is stupid."
Next Joke
"Girl asked me to rate a girl out of 10. I said, you a 14 cause you so basic."
"How did the stoner propose to his girlfriend? Marriage, you wanna?"
"How did the rednecks find their sister? Pretty good."
"Mafia boss: ""I want him swimming with the fishes!"" *later at the coral reef* Me: ""This is amazing!"" Mafia boss: ""Anything for you."""
"What's the hardest kind of waffle to find? A Carmen Sandy Eggo"
"John Boehner is lucky Pope Francis didn't splash any holy water on him. He wouldn't have been crying. He would have burst into flames."
"the dead are the best people to not show respect to. suck it, anonymous author of the epic of gilgamesh. I can run& breathe. your just bones"
"Sister: Mom wants you to come in and help fix dinner. Brother: Why? Is it broken?"
"Damn girl are you a planet? Because i can see Uranus through my binoculars at night."