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Joke of the Day

"daniel radcliffe's family were just known as the cliffe's until his great grandfather invented the kick flip"

"AI walks to the human AI: ""I relieve you, sir!"" Human: ""I am relieved."""

"If someone's embarrassed just tell them an astronaut did the same thing. For example, ""It's ok, Buzz Aldren once shit himself in an Arby's"""

"""I suppose you have to live somewhere."" - A more accurate motto for the state of Utah."

"I'm a fan of Star Wars. So at lunch I saved my pork for last so I could have Ham Solo."

"Why was the paralysed man uncool? Because he was lame."

"My family crest is just a photo of someone letting it go to voicemail."

"So last year I dressed up as a bop it for Halloween... I should've known I'd end up in jail"

"Your ex asking if you can still be friends is like kidnappers saying ""keep in touch"" after they let you go."

"Survival of the Fittest Women in the New Zealand wilderness survives by drinking her own breast milk. Your turn Bear Grylls"