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Joke of the Day

"Why did the T-Rex get hammered at noon? Because he's a Wino-saur!"

"In my dog's mind he's saving the world, one tree at a time."

"I taped Scooby Doo at 2am without realizing the commercials would change & now my 5 year old won't stop saying, ""Hot single ladies!""."

"What is the biggest joke in the world as of now? The current US presidential election"

"Why do Asians squint with their eyes? Because bombs are bright."

"""What's a good gift for someone who has everything?"" Meth. Next year they'll have nothing it'll be easier."

"Roses are flowers, violets are flowers, I'd love you more if you had super powers."

"""The trash compactor is full so just dump that in a pan for now."" - Inventor of the fruit cake."

"""Do you want to go out on a date?"" *sweats nervously* I C-CAN'T ""Why?"" *shoots friend next to him* I HAVE TO GO TO A FRIEND'S FUNERAL"

"Two Borg walk into a holodeck. .. They wanted a simulation of all mankind."