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Joke of the Day
"""The trash compactor is full so just dump that in a pan for now."" - Inventor of the fruit cake."
Next Joke
"What's are pirates favorite kind of weapon? RRRRtillary."
"Dad: HEY come here, did you go to school with this guy on tv? Me: Dad, that's Spongebob Squarepants Dad: Must've been in your sister's class"
"A woman was accused of attacking her husband with several guitars. When she got in front of the judge he asked, ""first offender?"" She replied, ""No. First a Gibson, second a Fender."""
"Nobody wanted to see the naked banana . . . it just lacked appeal"
"Tomb = Toom Womb = Woom Bomb = Boom"
"""You only want my daughter for one thing!"" yelled my girlfriend's mother. ""That's your fault for not teaching her to cook,"" I said."
"For her birthday, I bought my wife a pair of shoes and a vibrator. If she doesn't like the shoes, she can go fuck herself."
"Elon Musk was born in South Africa, and made an electric car. What if he had been born in Madagascar? He would have made a gas car"
"Facebook: the only book teens read these days."