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Joke of the Day

"In my dog's mind he's saving the world, one tree at a time."

"Sorry I romantically ran a seagull feather across your lips."

"If an apple a day keeps the doctor away how many orchards does it take for a lawyer?"

"What's the difference between a crackhead and a methhead? Toothless methheads give better $3.50 blowjobs"

"I went to a new zoo that has opened up in my area yesterday. Wasn't really worth it, they had one animal and it was a dog. Turns out it was a Shih Tzu."

"What words men never want to hear during sex? Hi honey, I'm home."

"Proves a point Bruce Jenner never had a car accident until he became a woman driver."

"Why do Computer Scientists always mix up Halloween and Christmas? Because OCT 31 = DEC 25!"

"What did George Washington have to do with Gorillas? As little as possible dummy!"

"I might not be a gynecologist But I know a cunt when I see one"