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Joke of the Day
"Toilet seats can give you STD's... ...If you sit down before the person stands up"
Next Joke
"Why did the man drink two beers with his lunch? Because he wanted to drink two beers with his lunch."
"Why are French guns the best to buy? They've never been fired, and only dropped once."
"I struggle against the ropes binding me, catching the scent of gas. ""You'll die too,"" I say. ""9 lives,"" my cat whispers, lighting a match."
"I could host an elegant dinner party, but I don't know enough people with simmering tension over long-held secrets to make it worthwhile."
"Why did the libertarian cross the road? None of your goddamn business. Am I being detained?"
"[tries to blow a kiss] Kiss: I have a boyfriend"
"""What's that?"" A divorce jar. Every time we fight you put a dollar in and I'm a little bit closer to freedom. *puts in dollar* ""WTH!?!"""
"Excuse miss can you tell me does this rag smell like chloroform?"
"Fuck me if I'm wrong, but isn't your name Cindrella?"