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Joke of the Day

"Has anyone out there tried ""Starbucks"" coffee? It's really good. I think that they have a location in LA."

"What's the difference between a violinist and a fiddler? How red their necks are."

"I blame instagram for making these basic b*tches think that they're ""models"" in real life."

"What is the difference between a horse and a cabbage? I have never been hungry enough that I could eat a cabbage."

"I date men whom have their life paths laid out firmly and don't waver. Yes, their paths are Psycho and Socio, but consistency is admirable."

"3YO: MOMMY HELP HELP! ME *throws cat off lap, drops phone, spills coffee on self, runs up stairs, kicks open door* 3YO: I want a snack."

"I just walked through a spiderweb and invented the next Macarena."

"What does idk stand for? Literally everyone I ask doesn't know."

"A kid has cancer Then he gets AIDS from his mom"

"Why don't you give a college kid fried chicken? Because their too hopped up on crack and politics to have an appetite."