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Joke of the Day
"Just bought a set of alphabet magnets for my fridge, so this may very well be my last tweet."
Next Joke
"A buddy had a lawn mower accident and died after getting the ends of his feet cut off. Doctors diagnosed him as lack-toes intolerant"
"My sister thinks macadamia nuts is an STD."
"Why do french people eat snails ? They don't like fast food."
"I guess I didn't lobby hard enough to make extroduce the word of the year."
"I have a friend who is half-Indian... He's Ian."
"Knock Knock Who's there ? Curly ! Curly who ? Curly Q !"
"I decided to write a joke about procrastination"
"If a shark is ever attacking me I'm gonna be like where are your parents do they know you act like this"
"Why did the chicken cross the school yard? To get to the other slide!"