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Joke of the Day

"As he inserted the rectal thermometer, I got a painfully hard and obvious erection... ""Maybe you should wait outside whilst I examine your dog,"" said the vet."

"[OC] Why does the NSA hate winter? Because they're not used to getting Snowden. (I'll see myself out)"

"Just saw 666 on a license plate and, in case you guys were wondering, Satan drives a Jeep."

"What do you call an anarchist who does skateboard tricks Radical"

"What drink did Hitler absolutely hate the taste of? Juice."

"What's in a name? Mainly, letters that make sounds."

"Hey guys, just to let you all know I'll be closing my Facebook account in three days... But in four days I'll be explaining why I didn't leave."

"I have a crush on a girl with a lazy eye But she won't even look at me.."

"Why did the scarecrow get a promotion? He was outstanding in his field!"

"Why do men stare at a woman's breasts? To prove they can focus on two things at once."