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Joke of the Day

"What is the difference between Jesus and a picture of Jesus? It only takes one nail to hang the picture...."

"the liberal media won't report that I can easily do 100 push-ups because they are frightened"

"A vegan, a gap year student and a girl with a boyfriend walk into a bar Who tells you first?"

"How do Jedis close their programs on a Mac? They use Force quit."

"[Gets down on one knee] We can save $7.99 a month if we share a single Netflix account."

"A serial killer leaves his mark on his victims by cutting off their left hand and right leg. Authorities say something sinister is afoot."

"People say that Twitter is pointless but it's teaching my children to be self sufficient."

"Stupid Joke I'd like to name my kid buoyancy, but whatever floats your boat."

"WHAT DO YOU GET WHEN YOU MIX A RETARD AND A FUCKHEAD? AN AMERICAN! YOU GET AN AMERICAN!"

"Hey Jerry Sandusky! What's the best thing about sex with twenty nine year olds? There's twenty of them!"