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Joke of the Day

"People who say they're in the best shape of their lives are usually about to die."

"So I guess nobody's into necrophilia humor. Because all the jokes are fucking dead."

"My girlfriend from high school called today. She's stoked about getting her driver's license."

"The weirdest thing just happened. I had Cancer, then 15 people on Facebook were brave enough to change their statuses, & now I'm cured."

"I can't believe I forgot to go to the gym today. That's 7 years in a row now."

"Penn State Prefers to be losing at half time.. Because at Penn State they like when you are a little behind in the locker room. - South Park"

"For me, girls are like blackjack... I try to go for 21 but I always hit on 14."

"Why do Communists drink herbal tea? Because proper-tea is theft."

"Q: Why did the boy close his eyes before opening the refrigerator? A: He didn't want to see the salad dressing."

"How is Donald Trump going to shut down the department of education? By renaming it 'Trump University'!"