185928

Joke of the Day

"They say Napoleon got the shakes whenever he put on his uniform... Modern scholars believe he may have had epaulettesy."

"Dad: Why are your eyes red, son? Son: I smoke weed, dad. Dad: Don't lie to me, you were crying because you're a faggot."

"What do you call a corrupt lawyer? Senator."

"Kids, in my day we didn't have text messaging. We had to write a ""Do you like me: Yes or no?"" note and pass it through 17 mutual friends."

"I burned my Hawaiian pizza today... I guess i should have put the oven on aloha setting"

"I read an article today about a cat who saved his owner's life. I'm still trying to teach mine not to vomit hairballs on my bed."

"noooo lost a drinking game guess i have to drink this alcohol i paid for with full intention of consuming"

"What's the only acceptable filetype at The Xavier Institute for Higher Learning? .docx"

"Student: Could I be trouble for something I didn't do? Teacher: Of course not. Student: Good, because I didn't do my homework."

"What website are the germans least likely to laugh at? Neingag."