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Joke of the Day
"NSFW What do jesus and girls have in common? The expression on their faces when they got nailed."
Next Joke
"*pays $20 for deluxe car wash* *hits roughly 3,287,998 bugs during 2 mile drive home*"
"My magic watch say's you don't have any underwear on... Oh, you do?... It must be 15 minutes fast."
"Golfer: ""Caddy do you think my game is improving?"" Caddy: ""Oh yes sir! You miss the ball much closer than you used to."""
"How does Ebenezer Scrooge make phone calls? Collect!"
"My ten year old made me pay him $10 to do the dishes, so I mugged him on his way to the bathroom because, you know, life lesson."
"Guy gets wife roses. She says ""I guess this means you want me on my back w my legs in the air?"" He says, ""Why, we don't have a Vase?"
"What's the difference between Ellen Pao and a pitbull? Lipstick"
"It has been said that the United States has the best congressmen money can buy."
"My computer sings. It's a Dell."