197552

Joke of the Day

"""hey dad, when did they outlaw hyperboles?"" ""hmm i dont know son, like a bajillion million years ago? idiot"" *cops bust down door*"

"What's the difference between a circus and a strip club? A circus is full of cunning stunts"

"What does a blonde and a tornado have in common? They both start blowing but in the end they take everything from you."

"I put my pants on like everyone else... As the cop taps on the glass and shines his high beam in my face."

"What do they call the Hunger Games in France? Battle Royale with cheese"

"KING SOLOMON: I shall cut it in two, half for each of you. WOMAN: sure ME: OH GOD NO! KING SOLOMON: ok this is clearly your meatball sub."

"I wanted to tell a joke about the fluoride in our water making us complacent But I just don't care"

"Two fish in a tank.. The one fish looks at the other and says ''How do you drive this thing?''"

"Why can't women be botanists? Because they'll break the glass ceiling."

"What do you call it when a cat howls? It Meyowls"