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Joke of the Day

"A lady asked me where my adopted son came from and I said if she doesn't know by now where babies come from it's not my place to tell her"

"You know, I love the ocean I think in a past life I was a semen"

"What do Jesus and my high school girlfriend have in common? They both bled for me."

"Be back in a few days. Gotta shave my legs for spring. But, before I go, what's the best way to sharpen hedge trimmers?"

"What does a 9 volt battery, and a pretty girls bumhole have in common? People tell you not to, but you're still going to put your tongue on it."

"Knock Knock Who's there ! Aardvark ! Aardvark who ? Aardvark a million miles for one of your smiles !"

"What's E.T short for He's got little legs."

"""When I was your age, I invented the time machine"" I told my Granddad."

"Why was the table pissed at Jesus? Because he looked a little cross."

"There is a new Barbie doll on the market - Hunchback Barbie ...pull the string and she cries ""Sanctuary! Sanctuary!"""