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Joke of the Day

"A lady asked me where my adopted son came from and I said if she doesn't know by now where babies come from it's not my place to tell her"

"What can you never eat for breakfast? Dinner."

"I hope that Senator Franken runs for President in 2020 and picks Jill Stein as his running mate That'd be a real Franken/Stein ticket"

"The three magic words EVERY woman loves to hear, ""You were right."""

"Q: What's blue and looks like a bucket? A: A red bucket in disguise."

"What is the best use for a wet dog?[x-post from /r/MeanJokes] Getting the smell of white people out of your house."

"Cutest joke ever What does a red grape tell a purple grape? Breathe, you idiot! Breathe!!"

"I don't know if you guys will get my yoga joke... ... it's kind of a stretch."

"A man walks into a zoo. The only animal in the entire zoo is a dog.... It's a Shitzu"

"I wish work was like high school when I could just poop my pants to get sent home."