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Joke of the Day

"Be back in a few days. Gotta shave my legs for spring. But, before I go, what's the best way to sharpen hedge trimmers?"

"Big Smoke walks into a bar He ordered two number nines, a number nine large, a number six with extra dip, a number seven, two number forty-fives, one with cheese, and a large beer."

"Mariah Carey'a New Year's performance. That's it..."

"There are 10 types of people in the world Those who know binary, those who don't, and those who weren't expecting this joke to be in ternary"

"Why does the Buick Century have that name? It's the average age of someone who drives one."

"Steve Irwin lived the way he died... With animals in his heart."

"'Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house, Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse... I really should have invested in one of those carbon monoxide detectors."

"What if Harambe was shot by a time traveler trying to prevent Planet of the Apes"

"What has long ears four legs and is worn on your head? An Easter bunnet!"

"It's weird how in England the passenger drives the car"