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Joke of the Day

"Doc, I've got a problem... ...every morning at 8 sharp i poop... Doc: How is that a problem? Guy: ...I wake up at 9..."

"""You're the bomb!"" ""No, you're the bomb!"" In America a compliment. In the Middle East an argument."

"What's a redditor who makes pirate jokes' favorite letters? It could be R and the C, but they definitely aren't OC."

"Teacher: Can you tell me something important that didn't exist 100 years ago ? Pupil: Me !"

"Q: How do you sink a Polish ship? A: Put it in water."

"A horse walks into the bar Several people left because they realised the possible dangers of that situation."

"Why do fishermen fish in north America? 'Cause they're all about that bass"

"My upstairs landlord asked if screams were coming from my apt or if she was dreaming. Either way, one of us has a terrifying neighbor."

"[date] Her: so you're a mathematician? Me: no actually I'm a *pythagorean doves fly out of my sleeve and hit her in the face* mathemagician"

"Chuck Norris has sex with every woman once a month. It causes a week of bleeding"