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Joke of the Day

"Steve Jobs will be back He's an Android afterall."

"If you have sex with a girl on Monday then your boy has sex with her on Tuesday, did he retweet her vagina?"

"I get about your body being a temple but... right now I wanna turn mine into a bouncy castle, it sounds more like fun. I'm all about fun."

"Yo mama is so fat ... she might die from a Cardiovascular Disease"

"Have you ever been in a Schindler's Lift? If you have, then did you ever feel that it could have carried more people?"

"*calls boss* Me: I can't come to work. Boss: Why not? Me: Gotham city needs me. Boss: ...You're not Batman. Me: Oh, yes, yes, exaaaactly."

"Joseph Smith sold so many copies of the Book of Mormon That they made him a prophet."

"I like it when I open a document and my monitor says WORD and I'm like YO."

"Winnie-the-Pooh is in tears He got Triggered."

"I was gonna tell a racist joke But fuck it, its too dark"