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Joke of the Day

"For some reason, my girlfriend asked how I view lesbian relationships... Apparently ""in HD"" was the wrong answer..."

"What do bricks and Latinas have in common? They both get laid by Mexicans..."

"Q: What did the duck say when she bought some lipstick? A: Put it on my bill."

"I like my women like I like my beer. . . . . . cold, pale and without a head."

"That's not what he meant!"

"I found a place where recycling rate is 98% Reddit."

"Why do people in Beijing smoke so many cigarettes? To get a breath of filtered air."

"How is an accordion like an artillery shell? Once you hear it, it's already too late."

"I don't mean to brag, but I'm extremely talented with my lips and tongue. *Whistles The Andy Griffith Show theme song flawlessly*"

"How did the butcher cure cancer? With salt."