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Joke of the Day
"How is an accordion like an artillery shell? Once you hear it, it's already too late."
Next Joke
"Please don't get me wrong, but I like to see people dying Seeing their hair become blonde is really awesome."
"Wife: (shouting) Stop watching porn,..... Wife: (shouting) Stop watching porn, I can hear it in the kitchen. Husband: I'm not, it's Sharapova vs Serena."
"What's the last thing a stripper does with her asshole before starting her shift? Drops him off at band practice."
"Might be time to get in shape. Halfway up these stairs and I'm considering setting up base camp and trying again in the morning."
"(Real Story) All of a sudden, my Steam language was set to Russian. I was changing it back to English, when my hand slipped. But it's okay, now. I have everything in Czech."
"WHAT I ORDER: French toast WHAT WAITER HEARS: If my water goes below the brim you die"
"Why did the meme crossed the road A meme beme screme"
"Nerdy financial humor. You have been warned. I started showing more interest in one of my investments. It appreciated it."
"Barkeep. Send a drink over to little ms. thang over there. Tell her it's from me Sir, that's a Ms. Pac-Man machine *raises glass, winks*"