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Joke of the Day

"*wears a tuxedo tshirt to interview as a joke* McDonald's Manager: Oh wow, are you from corporate?"

"Once I was travelling in a taxi, the taxi driver said: ""I am very happy with this job. I am my own boss and nobody can order me what to do."" Then I said: ""Take left."""

"What's the difference between Yogurt and L.A.? Yogurt has a live and thriving culture."

"What do you call a search for small guitars? Uke hunt!"

"What did the undertaker say as the coffin fell out of the car? ""We'll have to rehearse that."""

"Friend told me this one today. Fed Ex and UPS Did you hear Fed-Ex and UPS joined together and made a conglomerate?They called it fed up."

"I got attacked by someone who suffers with premature ejaculation today. He just came out of nowhere."

"The wife and I were trying to spice things up in the bedroom... so now I cumin her every thyme."

"My shower had a bit of mildew- -but all it took was a little... scrubbing!!!"

"No matter how prepared you think you are, a retractable vacuum cord will always find the weakness in your defense."