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Joke of the Day

"Dear girls who take a picture in slutty clothing and glasses & label the caption ""Geek lol"" You're not a geek, you're a whore who found glasses"

"What did the priest say at the salad bar? Lettuce pray."

"Cartoons lied to me as a child. I was lead to believe quicksand was going to be a much larger problem in life."

"How many portuguese people can fit on a scooter? A Brazilian"

"A priest walks into a bar.. He looks around and leaves disappointed. Everyone is over 18."

"Why did the hummer cross the river? For the insurance money."

"your mom is so stupid... She put gum up her ass so she can pop shit. A very old joke that for some reason makes me giggle every time..."

"Carl: Perfect weather tonight. Me: Tell me something I don't know. Carl: Butterflies taste with their feet. Me: Fair enough."

"My wife caught me looking at a seagull at the beach so now we're in this big fight."

"How do you call a meerkat? C'meerkat."