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Joke of the Day

"Just realized why women love shoes over clothing, because no matter how much weight they gain, the shoes still fit."

"So a hydraulic jack walks into his family reunion. . . and says look at all these Pump kins!"

"Met someone on Craigslist, guess I'm dating a grill now."

"I had some North Korean food yesterday... The [deleted] was delicious!"

"What did the man say to his big breasted ex-wife? Thanks for the mammaries."

"I noticed you're eating that bag of popcorn one piece at a time. So how many people have you murdered?"

"Why can't Chinese couples have caucasian babies? Because two wongs dont make a white"

"If you're meeting someone, get to the place early so you'll have a few minutes to kick back and repeatedly text, ""Where are you"""

"[sees woman reading] ""Gone With The Wind? Great book! I love how the *clenches fist* tornado takes Dorothy & Toto to the Land Of Oz."""

"You must have been born on a highway... Beacuse that's where most accidents happen"