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Joke of the Day

"You know you're an Alcoholic when you can't even say the word ""sober"" without making air quotes"

"What does Gucci say when it's cold outside? It's fucking cold"

"I don't always have a cool Facebook status, but when I do, an older relative ruins it with a lame comment."

"A call When making food, mum asked me to **call** out to her once I finish draining something. So, being a smart ass, I called her phone."

"Whoever said nothing good comes easy Never had a premature ejaculation."

"Whoops, wrong sub"

"What did JFK say about his multiple affairs? ""I did them not because they were easy, but because I was hard."""

"New Viagra Product !! Viagra now available in powder form to put in tea... It does nothing for erections but stops your Biscuits from getting soft and falling into the tea..!!"

"When I'm in a room full of toddlers, I can't help but scan it for potential serial killers"

"I just had a brush with Death Is it weird to name your toothbrush?"