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Joke of the Day

"A call When making food, mum asked me to **call** out to her once I finish draining something. So, being a smart ass, I called her phone."

Next Joke
 
"I went to a metal concert, the singer was a bit ill... Still fuckin' sick though!"
"What does a cow measure its harddrive in? Moogabytes"
"How did the Scottish man find the sheep in the tall grass? Surprisingly pleasing."
"Why is there a 100,000 oil limit in World of Warcraft Garrisons? Because anything more than that might cause an invasion by the United States of America!"
"Where did Pedobear go to college? Brigham Young"
"""I'm Dan if I do, and Dan if I don't."" -Dan"
"Facebook should change its name to Acquaintance Birthday Reminder"
"You can't compare Tim Cook and Donald Trump It's like comparing apples to oranges."
"Don McClean's wife just surpassed American Pie as his greatest hit."