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Joke of the Day

"I have qualities of both Albert Einstein and Arnold Schwarzenegger Body of Einstein, brain of Schwarzenegger"

"Q: What do you call a fly with no wings? A: A walk."

"Dear Architect, surely this bald spot on my head is a glitch in the matrix?"

"How do you catch a dyslexic fish? Ya get it Hooked on Phonics!"

"Did you hear about a vampire that joined the Nazi party? He was nazi in the mirror as well."

"the best thing about being in a relationship is you can get crippling emotional abuse any time you want"

"Researchers found a deep-ocean microbe which could explain transition from simple to complex cells However, it passed away before it even had begun explaining."

"I bet rapists can get their straw in a Capri Sun on the first try."

"I'm glad I found out it's illegal to destroy US currency. I was about to feed $50 bills through a shredder."

"If I had 1,000,000 dollars, I would pay to have sex with your mom. And then I would invest the other 999,995 bucks."