102025

Joke of the Day

"As a girl who lifts weights at the gym... I experience a lot of flexual tension"

"I'm Starting a Fundraiser to Help Restore Sight to Seniors with Degenerative Eye Problems. Please Upvote for visibility."

"I once got diarrhea on a road trip but I went on, undeterred."

"""Hi I can't remember the name of this actress.You know her, she's in that movie you saw. She's got that hair."" -actual message from my mom"

"What's the worst animal to play cards with? A cheetah. Because it'll rip your fucking face off."

"Can't wait for the first bad thing to happen in 2017 so I can post ""what is this, 2016?"" Ha! Today an on duty seeing eye dog growled at me."

"In a meeting. Can I go first? Thanks. Gets up and leaves."

"What kind of fruit always has a wedding_ A cantaloupe....."

"Dark comedy is like food. Not everyone gets it."

"What's the difference between a dead baby and a table? You can't fuck a table."