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Joke of the Day

"What did Sean Connery say to a couple of lobsters he saw take up an extra parking space? ""You're two shellfish."""

"Thanks for sharing your moon with me on Instagram. We don't have a moon where I live."

"My nose was clogged the other day. A dutch woman kicked me right in the face."

"A grasshopper hops into a bar... The bartender sees him and says ""Hey, we have a drink named after you."" The grasshopper looks up and says, ""You have a drink named Murray?"""

"What are OJ Simpsons' favorite keys on a keyboard? / \ Esc"

"I like my reddit jokes like I like my coffee... Dark and tasteless."

"Who was the winner of the first Tour De France? The Wehrmacht Tank division."

"My love life. ..."

"I had surgery to change myself from Asian to Caucasian. It was a real eye opening experience"

"What's the difference between a cow and 9/11? ...you can't milk a cow for a decade straight."