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Joke of the Day
"How did Jared Fogle lose 40 pounds? He dumped his girlfriend."
Next Joke
"A calculus lecture at a college Only four students are present. Suddenly six students get up and leave the auditorium. The professor thinks: ""If two more come in, there will be no one left!"""
"Everyone had that one lesbian gym teacher growing up."
"Your mama so fat.... She uses a paint roller to apply lipstick."
"My husband's doing that cute thing again where he thinks he's right. *throws his shit out on the lawn* *makes a bonfire*"
"Beethoven must've hated his music... Sure he spent a lifetime composing, but so far he's spent centuries decomposing."
"Staring deeply into the abyss. Paralyzed by fear. Unable to move, let alone function. In short, yes, Pandora. I'm still listening."
"Cop: do you know why I pulled u over? Me: yeah, I was going like 120 back there Cop:.... Me:.. Cop: sir, your tailamp is out Me:..."
"What do you call a guy with a rabbit up his arse? Warren"
"My wife said she wouldn't have sex with me until I did everything on the ""To-Do list"" So I scratched out **#1** ""*Wash the car*"" and replaced it with ""*Have a three-some with Becky and Wife*"""