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Joke of the Day
"Everyone had that one lesbian gym teacher growing up."
Next Joke
"The real reason the Mayan civilization collapsed is they never updated their Adobe."
"*slides $5 to the funeral director* Maybe you can get me the widow's phone number?"
"So I thought about getting a Chinese hooker... But then I realized that I'd just be horny again in an hour"
"Ladies, here's a secret. The moment you are happy and over us, we will send you a text saying that we miss you."
"Mitt Romney."
"""Don't put it on my plate if you don't want me to eat it!"" - me to my kid, who's crying because I ate the playdoh burger he put on my plate"
"Why did the twins have twice as many shirts as pants? Because they shared genes!"
"What is a missionary's favorite car a convertible"
"Bad news, guys. Throwing a cat through a wall doesn't make a funny, cat-shaped hole. Not even close."