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Joke of the Day

"I made a Starbucks barista cry I put my name down as Dad and he stood there calling it over and over again with no reply."

Next Joke
 
"I'm extending the weekend one MORE day for everyone. I talked to your boss, (s)he said no problem as long as you dress slutty on wed."
"Face down, Ass up. That's how I like to tie my shoes."
"What do you get when you cross a mosquito with a rock climber? Nothing. You can't cross a vector with a scalar."
"If you're first on a YouTube comment thread, I assume you're last in pretty much everything else."
"My best friend died in a freak boiling water accident. He will be mist."
"They say children are a gift from god. I'm totally wide-open to regifting."
"May I get your name? Yes, its ""I'm The Only Person Here Waiting For Coffee."""
"What do you call someone with no body and just a nose ? Nobody knows"
"What is the Fonz looking forward to the most in the future? The iPhone Ayyyye-t"