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Joke of the Day
"What did the Polack and the Native American name their first kid? Running Stupid"
Next Joke
"Why do fat people say they have to start eating right? They've obviously mastered the art of chewing and swallowing."
"Ghosts never write encouraging stuff on my mirror. It's always ""KILL"" or ""MURDER"" or ""YOU'RE OUT OF NUTELLA"""
"What did you get for your birthday? Another year!"
"The Irishman's dilemma. Do you eat the potatoes now or do you let them ferment so you can drink them later?"
"What do you call a woman who's not wearing underwear? A barracuchi."
"What do you call a huge pile of kittens? A meowntain!"
"Doctor: How did you get all those bruises? Me: Rough sex Doctor: That looks unhealthy and should stop Me: Talk to your nurse about that"
"Who are the greatest philosophers today? The TSA. They are always asking people, ""Who are you?"", ""Where did you come from?"", ""Why are you here?"", and ""Where are you going?"""
"Apologies your honor [slides ventriloquist dummy back under my seat] I was told these proceedings were going to be televised."