90941

Joke of the Day

"If life hands you lemons, you are anthropomorphizing. In some way, you've handed those lemons to yourself."

Next Joke
 
"Bill Clinton: ""I sure hope Hillary gets better interns than I did..."" ""All of mine sucked"""
"""I'm a big fan of 50 cent. Or as he's known in Zimbabwe: four hundred million dollars."""
"""My girlfriend is a feminist"", I explained to my grandfather ""Well, heck son - nothing wrong with a feminine woman"" he replied."
"I used to give anal to other men... But it's all behind me now."
"I like my coffee like I like my women ... Hot, wet, and all over my crotch."
"I got a sweater for my birthday. I'd have preferred a moaner or a screamer. Credit to Steven Wright."
"A man, a lawyer, a redneck, a nun, a blonde, a dog, and a priest walk into a bar. The bartender looks up and says, ""Is this some kind of joke?"""
"How can you smuggle 500 Jews across the border in one car? In an ash tray"
"If you've been married less than a year, stop with all the love and marriage quotes. S hit will eventually hit the fan..."