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Joke of the Day

"Why do some fish always look high? Because of all the seaweed."

"I regularly have gold plaques and 1st place ribbons made up for my liver so it knows just how much I appreciate all it's hard work."

"How do you know if an Italian person is mute? When you see he has no hands."

"Sex is like snow. You never know how many inches you are going to get or how long it is going to last."

"She was Hannah Montana when Bush was president. Thanks, Obama."

"All these Marvel movies, and they sure are taking their time getting to Thanos and the Infinity Gauntlet Don't worry. They'll get there... Avengually."

"Snitching is common in Thompkins Square Park It's full of rats"

"Did you hear about the corduroy pillows? They're making headlines!"

"Did you hear that David Copperfield has aids now? Yea, he was doing Magic."

"What did the polite homosexual man say to another at the bar? Mind if I push your stool in for you?"